The feeling of elation that accompanies an unexpected contact by someone who mattered and made an important positive difference in one’s past is impossible to difficult to describe. But those feelings include emotions touching on giddiness, gratitude, admiration, respect, and a dozen others. Those sensations also tend to replace some others that time has permitted to wither: self-respect, social value, justifiable pride, among others. As the initiator of such contacts, though, others’ reactions can be disappointing—recollections may have faded, responses may be unenthusiastic, memories may not be as positive as anticipated, or a long-lost reason for a past rupture in the relationship may could suddenly erupt into flames. I think the potential for recovering the positive aspect of the relationship outweighs the dangers; but it’s best to be prepared.
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Dread feeds on powerlessness and the sense that your opponents desire nothing more than your utter defeat, up to and including your death. Your dread is based not only on fear, but on fact. Once dread takes up residence in your mind, you can never again be free. Even if your dreaded opponent is imprisoned or dies, his animosity lives on. It grows.
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I am staring at one third of a demi-tasse cup of espresso that has lost its warmth and could not capture my interest this morning. In its place, I would like a cold glass of sparkling water, kept cold with crushed ice and flavored with a generous squeeze of fresh lime juice. The ideal accompaniments would include chunks of cantaloupe, papayas, strawberries, mangos, grapes, and various citrus fruits. Considering where I live and local seasons, I am afraid I would have to import several of my preferred taste treats. Maybe a freshly-baked almond croissant would go well with the rest. Of course, the moment these delectable things appeared on my table, my taste for them probably would transform into an interest in beers, chips, pretzels, and beef jerky. Or nothing at all.
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