Author Archives: John Swinburn

About John Swinburn

"Love not what you are but what you may become."― Miguel de Cervantes

Delaying the Inevitable

This morning, I woke later than normal—almost 6:30—slipped on a pair of shorts, a shirt, and flip-flops, and headed to the only nearby grocery store open at that hour, Walmart. There, I bought Jimmie Dean hot pork breakfast sausage, blackberries, … Continue reading

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Inexplicable Thoughtskipping

Today sprinted through the calendar like a gazelle accelerating across the savanna, attempting to outrun hungry cheetahs. The day was a blur, though in occasional stop-action or slow motion. My intent (always good) was to spend the morning on the … Continue reading

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Deckish

My brother was transferred to another hospital yesterday, a facility that specializes in, among other things, wound care. No one with professional medical knowledge seems willing to offer a firm estimate of the length of time he will be there, … Continue reading

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Cleaning the Pipes

“He awoke to the sound of a flood of tears washing away the banks of the river on which he’d drifted aimlessly for a lifetime.” Salt water produces a loud chorus as it carves new channels in solid ground, unlike … Continue reading

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Still No Answers

Still, nothing definitive from the doctors and hospital in Houston. While it’s frustrating to me, it must be absolutely maddening to my brother. Today marks day number 17 or 18, I think, since his last admission into the hospital. His … Continue reading

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Have You Ever?

I think I’ve written everything I’ve needed to write. There’s nothing new in my brain. Everything I write now (here, I’m referring not to fiction but to “what’s in my head”) is simply a rehash of something I’ve written before, … Continue reading

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Thoughts When I’m Alone

I woke up a few minutes before five this morning, alone. The light from the kitchen, under the bedroom door, suggested my wife was already up. I got up and wobbled across the house to her study, where I found … Continue reading

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For future use

This just fell from my fingers a while ago. I felt I had to capture it for future use and this is the only place I can reliably find stuff. So… He lured her in with food. It started with … Continue reading

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Days of Terror

Today marks the anniversary of the terrorist attacks on the United States on September 11, 2001. As awful as that day was, I will reflect also on another awful anniversary the world…at least some of the world…remembers today. That is, … Continue reading

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Actual Monday Thoughts

I updated the GPS software in the Subaru, thanks to a friend who had received an email from Subaru with a link to a software updater. I’m not sure why Subaru opted not to send me a link, but that’s … Continue reading

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Collected Thought Fragments

I stayed in bed far too long last night. I was in bed around 8:30 and got up this morning around 5:30, nine hours. That’s too long for me. Six or seven hours usually does it. But I wasn’t feeling … Continue reading

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Struggling to Feel Better

After a good time in town today—where I had a nice lunch of Philly Cheese Steak at Core Brewing, followed by grocery shopping at Kroger and Sam’s Club—we came home and suddenly my energy just collapsed. I could barely get … Continue reading

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Elevator Eyes

Loudly speak the word “transubstantiation,” enunciating clearly, in a crowded elevator and observe the reactions of the people around you. There may be one or two who, not quite sure what was just announced, will say, “Excuse me?” Another couple … Continue reading

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Dating Maggie and a Hospitalization Update

I knew her as Margaret. It was many years later that I learned she goes by Maggie. Maybe she did at the time and I didn’t know it. I just knew her name was Margaret and I found her quite … Continue reading

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One Day I’ll Read What I’ve Written

I have a doctor’s appointment this afternoon. I could have waited until my annual physical, scheduled for later this month with the same doctor, but the persistent cough that seems to have worsened over the past three months argued otherwise. … Continue reading

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Chicken Stories

I met another writer, a much more prolific writer than I, over coffee yesterday morning. She asked whether I would attend the upcoming read-around next Monday. I said I would if I did not have to go back to Houston … Continue reading

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Thinking Beyond the Stars

I sat on the deck for at least three hours last evening, watching dull daylight wash into a dim darkness interrupted ever-so-slightly by a few bright stars, the red planet, and the blinking lights of airplanes. The planet I assumed … Continue reading

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Pleasure Deferred

We had dinner with friends last night and learned more about their upcoming trips. As they described their plans, I felt pangs of jealousy. I want to go on road trips and visit friends and family. I want to drive … Continue reading

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Laboring in Thought

Since my last post, things have changed. My computer remains in the hands of the Geek Squad, but not for long. Though they cannot figure out why the thing dies and cannot be resurrected for days on end, they say … Continue reading

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Clairvoyant

One week to the day after my computer died, only to be resurrected a few days later, it died again. My experience with Geek Squad the second time around was frustrating in the extreme. The entanglement with Best Buy’s technology … Continue reading

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Reckoning

It doesn’t take much ingratitude to change one’s perspective on humanity. Total commitment can descend into disregard in a flash. Compassion can blossom into anger in the time it takes for a hummingbird’s heart to skip a beat.

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Frustrations and Food and Philosophy

I spent a good part of yesterday chasing down a commitment for home health care assistance for my brother on a temporary basis. After assurances by the hospital social services manager that the services were “all set,” I discovered the … Continue reading

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Domestic Chores

Just as I was about to leave the house to go buy sterile long cotton swabs, ham, cheese, tomatoes, light wheat bread, and jalapeños, it occurred to me that I had put clothes in the dryer a while ago. I … Continue reading

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The Drum Beat of Technology

A couple of days without a full-fledged computer is troublesome, a fact that in and of itself is troublesome. Two days without a computer and my anxiety grows like kudzu! I think a break is in order, a meditative intervention … Continue reading

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Puzzling Me

I woke this morning around 3:00 a.m., much earlier than usual. When I’m in my own house, I have no constraints on my movements when I get up so early because I know how to minimize the noise I make … Continue reading

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